Socially Acceptable Insanity--
--the definition of love, courtesy of Her. Please go see it, if you haven’t already. In my opinion, it’s a beautiful, funny, and imaginative film about the relationships that make up our lives and how we choose to experience them. But I’m not really here to be a movie critic. I would, however, like to give credit where credit is due. So...
Marry me, Spike Jonze. Or, at the very least, let’s grab some coffee. Or make out a little. (Call me.)
Happiness is a choice, but I don’t believe love is. You can choose to care for someone, but love cannot be forced, nor can it be thought away. Being in love is pretty crazy. It’s insane to fall for someone so unexpectedly, so fast; to want, without warning, to share yourself with another being and explore life together. I feel crazy for still being in love with him, even though we’re no longer a couple. Whoever came up with the formula “it takes half the amount of time you were with someone to get over them,” was wrong, or clearly never fell in love with The Big Buck Hunter Ram Champion (local chapter).
It has been my goal this new year to start fresh, to live in the present, to allow myself to experience moments upon moments of joy, and not let things out of my control get the best of me. But fond memories of “heartbeats" shared in the brief time we spent together keep replaying in my mind, as if begging me not to forget. I have grown to possess a strong will and a well-seasoned ticker, so I know what I need to do to move on. Yet, I constantly find myself asking, "Why, if we can’t be together, must I keep holding on?" Then, I remember, “the past is just a story we tell ourselves.” And I realize the reason I refuse to let go is because this is my favorite love story (and I’ve read some good ones), and I want to keep reading it—I don’t want it to end. But we are only here briefly, so it’s time I start writing something new. And it’s also time I have a little more faith, because “everything will be alright in the end. If it’s not alright, it’s not yet the end."
You know, and I know... “I’ve never loved anyone the way I loved you… Now I know how."